Reading Response #2

Yousef Abou Areda                                                                                             Class 811

                                                               Reading Response #2

The book, The Fault in Our Stars, by John Green is about a 16- year old named Hazel Grace, and her battle through stage 4 thyroid cancer and metastasis (the spread of cancer) in her lungs. Hazel has to carry an oxygen machine, which basically breathes for her, because her lungs aren’t able to inhale and exhale oxygen on her own. Eventually, she forms a beautiful romantic relationship with Augustus Waters, whom had cancer and had his leg amputated during the process. After meeting Augustus, or Gus for short, she seems to be more of a teenager. She lives life to the fullest and cherishes every single moment she has with Augustus, with each moment becoming more special then the last. Overall, Hazel goes from an insecure and withdrawn character, to excited and happy with Augustus, and eventually devastated, but at peace without Augustus.

In the very beginning of the book, Hazel is initially a withdrawn and insecure character. One scene that highlights her insecurity was when she and her friend Kaitlyn went to the mall to hang out. As Kaitlyn is trying on lots of expensive shoes like, Mary Janes, Hazel just sits there and watches her try the shoes on. She thinks to herself that she can’t be like Kaitlyn, or any teenage girl, because of her cancer. It’s as if she wants to be like any teenage girl, but she doesn’t feel like she has the power to do that. Indeed, how can someone be confident if they feel powerless? In the text, it says, “ she finally bought three pairs and I just bought flip-flops”(page 44).  Hazel wants to be a normal teenager, but her insecurity forces her to buy flip-flops instead of three, cute shoes like Kaitlyn. In Hazel’s mind, Kaitlyn brings out the beauty of the shoes, but she believes that if she wore it, she’d be ruining the beauty of the shoes. She believes Kaitlyn has the freedom to look beautiful and that people would compliment her, in contrast to herself who people would  view with disgust. This scene underscores Hazel’s obsession with other people’s opinion of her and how she is powerless to not care. Her cancer symbolizes a destructive force that crushes her will and forcefully takes away her freedom. In addition to Hazel’s insecurity, she’s also withdrawn. When her mom tells her to go to support group, Hazel refuses to go, leading to a big argument between her and mom. Hazel’s support group is a big circle of people with cancer and cancer survivors, who gather together to share their feelings. However, Hazel just wants to watch tv. In the text, it says, “Mom: Hazel, you’re a teenager. You’re not a little kid anymore. You need to make friends, get out of the house, and live your life. You’re going to Support Group. Me: UGGGGGGG”. (page 7) Eventually, Hazel goes to Support Group just to make her parents happy. Hazel ended up just sitting in a chair, not sharing her ideas with anyone, and not saying anything for the entire two hours. Hazel doesn’t feel comfortable sharing her feelings with anyone because she’s always by herself and never really learned how too. All in all, Hazel is a very independent person who doesn’t feel significant.

Towards the middle of the book, Hazel puts more energy into the things she loves, and is more involved with other people, mainly Augustus. Ever since Hazel was a little girl, she’s loved a book called An Imperial Affection. It was the one thing she could connect with in her life. However, the book never reveals what becomes of the main character, and Hazel spends her whole life wondering what happened. The author moved to Amsterdam, and despite Hazel’s many emails, has never responded. Eventually, we find out that each person in Support Group gets one wish through donations. Hazel used her wish as a child to go to Disney Land, but Augustus never used his wish. He eventually uses it to go to Amsterdam with Hazel and her mother in order to meet the author, Peter Van Houten, and find out what became of the main character. When she finds out, she finally shows some excitement by complementing Augustus and saying he’s the best. However, she finds out that she can’t go due to the medical risks. A few days later, her mother tells her that her primary doctor, Dr. Maria, said she can go as long as there is enough oxygen on the plane. In the text, it says, “ MOM, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! I shouted, and she came to the bed and let me hug her and kiss her” (page 127). This is the first time in the whole book where we see Hazel this excited and opening up to her mother so much. She’s never affectionately hugged or kissed her mother up before this point in the novel, and this is the first time the reader sees her truly open up. In the beginning of the book, if her mother had told her that they were going to Amsterdam, she would have simply said, wow that’s very cool mom, not showing much emotion. However, as time went on, and Augustus became a part of her life, she becomes a much more energetic person, and more involved in the things she does. Augustus has a big effect on Hazel, and just as her cancer was a symbol of something that destroyed her freedom, Augustus became her freedom, so Augustus is a symbol himself. Overall, Hazel becomes more involved in things she does ever since Augustus came into her life.

Toward the end of the book, Hazel is devastated by Augustus’s death. Augustus’s death seemed worse than dying herself for Hazel. It was like something hit her heart with such impact that everything around her ceased to exist. In the text, it says, ‘What can we do? Mom asked. I shrugged. But she kept asking, as if there was something she could, until finally I just kind of crawled across the couch into her lap and my dad came over and held my legs really tight and I wrapped my arms around my mom’s middle and they held on to me for hours while the tide rolled in.”(page 267)This time, it wasn’t just her freedom that was taken away. When Augustus died, a part of Hazel also died along with him. Hazel really loved Augustus because he accepted her for who she is and loved her for it. Although Augustus is dead, he still lives in Hazel. Hazel does manage to find peace in Augustus’ death a couple of weeks after his death. She finds his eulogy, which he wants read at her funeral, to Peter Van Houten, before he died. In the text, is says, “You don’t get to chose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers. I do, Augustus. I do”. (page 313) With those words being read, she finally manages to find closure to his death. She still has a part of Augustus’s spirit, and she knew that although he was gone, he’d always be watching over her. She realizes that the only person that can hurt her is Augustus, and that was by him dying. She no longer feels insecure because she has a say in who gets to hurt her. Augustus had just given her back the freedom cancer had taken away from her.

To sum up, The Fault in Our Stars taught me to live life to the fullest. Hazel knows that any day could be her last, and Augustus taught her that. Don’t live your life trying to be someone you’re not, because you are who you are, and there’s nothing wrong with that. The Fault in Our Stars teaches you to cherish all memories, good and bad, because you don’t realize how special something is until you lose it. It teaches you to balance the good and bad moments. Many people fail to realize that life is a gift, and you have to make the most of it, because one day, you’re not going to be here anymore. The Fault in Our Stars is an amazing book, and you see Hazel go from insecure, to energetic and excited, to a peaceful character, showing growth and development as a character.